New resource centre to be set up to promote, strengthen marriages - Singapore's Online Community

**djchris** · 22-03-2007, 09:05 AM

SINGAPORE : A new resource centre will be set up by the end of this year to help dispense advice on married life.

It's called "Marriage Central" and it will be a one-stop centre for couples to turn to if they're planning to get married.

The centre is also open to newly-weds as well as those who have been married for a long time.

And you also get to have a say on what the centre should do - the National Family Council is inviting feedback on how to make it effective and relevant.

Keeping a stable, happy marriage is no walk in the park.

Lawyers Sukdave Singh and Anuradha Sharma, who have five children, make it look easy.

But Anu, who handles divorce cases, said most marriages could have been saved if there had been better communication.

And this is something the new Marriage Central will be promoting.

"I think Marriage Central is important because of the younger generation. (Look at) the divorce rates are among the youngsters. Just a few years of marriage and they throw in the towel over some stupid misunderstanding. Or they'll usually come out to say they are incompatible and that's it. That's not how a marriage should work. It's a give and take process," said lawyer Anuradha Sharma, who has been married for 17 years and has five kids aged 4 to 16 years old.

The marriage rate in Singapore has been falling from 49.5% in 2000 to 43.2% in 2005.

But the divorce rate has been rising.

About 6 out of 1,000 couples divorced in the 1990s. In 2005, the figure rose to almost 8 in every 1,000.

The key to make a marriage last may change with time and depends on a case by case basis.

But this is what the new Marriage Central should promote, according to Ibrahim Bulat, who has been married to Fatimah Jaafar for over four decades.

"How we lasted this long - coming to 42 years this July - is that marriage is not just a matter of love, it's both art and science. In a marriage, one would have to have the basic foundation and knowledge on how to keep families together," said Ibrahim Bulat.

Marriage Central will be set up at the Registry of Marriages by the end of this year. It will be the one-stop centre for the public to get information, and for family life champions to work together to promote and strengthen marriages.

And it will take a holistic approach - addressing the needs of not just married couples, but also young people.

It said it will not duplicate services currently provided by Voluntary Welfare Organisations.

Instead, it'll work with them to coordinate and synergise efforts at a national level to promote marriage wellness.

"It's really about enhancing the values and teaching young people the value in long, trusting relationships. That's where we feel we should be working on with various other agencies and ministries. MOE is one of them," said Anita Fam, chairperson of 'Stengthening the Institution of Marriage' Workgroup, National Family Council.

"And for our young men in NS (national servicemen), we'll be working with MINDEF. We may roll out family life education with our young men, teaching them the value of relationship."

Marriage Central will also encourage couples to seek help, such as counselling, before it's too late.

It could benefit couples like Chia Puay Yong and his wife Janet, when their marriage came under severe strain when their restaurant business ran up millions of dollars in losses.

"I think it's a very useful network for married couples, or people who are thinking of getting married, because we can share our experiences with them," said Puay Yong, a father of four children.

The public is invited to share your thoughts about what the new resource centre should do. They can send their ideas to the National Family Council at this website. - CNA /ls