AS she sat quietly eating her carrot cake at a hawker centre near her home, Madam Lim Sian Hua endured the stares and whispers of those around her.

Then, in a brazen move, a woman sitting nearby - a total stranger - walked straight up to her and asked for a 4-D number.

The woman demanded to know the serial number on the death certificate of Madam Lim's husband.

'I was shocked, it was a very mean thing to do. I just told her I can't remember,' Madam Lim said.

The woman was not too happy. She demanded again to know. But after receiving the same answer again, she went back to her companions.

It was one of the sad incidents that have plagued the family since the death of Mr Tan Jee Suan, the 46-year-old former odd-job worker who was hit by an MRT train two Wednesdays ago.

Madam Lim, 43, recalled the Friday morning incident at the hawker centre in Boon Lay when The New Paper On Sunday visited her spartan flat last night.

Speaking in Mandarin, she said: 'The woman was from a group of about ten. They were talking among themselves and staring at me, my two boys and my younger sister.'

She tried to ignore them, but was caught off-guard by being asked such an insensitive question.

HATES GOING OUT

Madam Lim knows that many are observing her family's every move - 'they want to know what I do with the $500,000 donation I received from the public'.

The money poured in from sympathisers after media reports highlighted the family's plight in losing the father.

At the point of Mr Tan's death, the family, living in spartan conditions in their four-room HDB flat in Boon Lay Place, did not even have money for his funeral services.

Madam Lim worked in a factory to support the family as her husband found it difficult to get jobs.

While grateful for the help, Madam Lim is disturbed by some reactions.

'So far, this is the worst encounter I've had,' she said of the stranger asking for 4-D numbers.

'Going out is so stressful for me now. Everyone is questioning whether I know how to use the donation money properly.'

What the number-fishing woman probably didn't know is this: The family, which can now afford individual portions of food, has remained thrifty by still sharing a $2 plate of carrot cake.

'My sister asked the boys to buy one portion each. I said no, because we don't eat much and we shouldn't waste,' Madam Lim reasoned.

'Besides, what would people say?'

Even some neighbours did not spare her feelings when she passed their unit recently. Madam Lim overheard their gossipy whisperings through their open front doors.

'They were commenting on why my husband fell onto the tracks and why is the family like this and so on,' she said, not wanting to elaborate.

Then, gesturing to her clean but spartan living room, she looked this reporter in the eye and said: 'It's not as if I wanted this. It's not as if I asked him to go.'

Since her husband's cremation last Sunday, she has felt imprisoned in her own home.

'I have matters I need to settle and I need to move on, go back to my job at the factory. But I keep putting all these things off, going out only when I feel that I can face people,' she said.

'Whenever I go out, I feel like an exhibit. People stare and look and point fingers. I'd rather stay home.'

Madam Lim added that she will probably return to work in 'about two weeks'.

As for the money she has received, she said: 'I've already put $300,000 in the fixed deposit for my sons' education and upbringing. The rest I'll use to pay off our home loan, debts to various people and put some in our savings account.'

Madam Lim knows that the money she received is a big sum.

'It is a lot of money, I know. I'm very grateful for the public's kind generosity. I'm determined to make good use of it and not to simply spend it on unnecessary items,' she said.

Like a new pair of Nike basketball shoes, which she sees as a luxury for her son.

NO TO SHOES

Fifteen-year-old Yong Da, the elder of two boys, is an avid basketballer who harbours hopes of being selected for the national squad.

He said: 'My current shoes are second-hand from a friend. He has a lot of shoes and gave these old ones to me. The soles are getting really worn out and it's slippery.'

But Madam Lim said: 'I told him to get a $20 pair or something. I will not buy the Nike one for him. Other people's money should not be used to buy branded goods.'

This insistence on continuing with their old lifestyle can be seen in their home.

Packets of instant noodles, biscuits and bread are stacked on a table in the living room - the family still eats them for breakfast and lunch.

'For dinner, I ask my son to buy some simple rice and dishes,' Madam Lim said.

Her kitchen is bare, save for a rusty old refrigerator, a washing machine that has seen better days, a stove and a small corner shelf.

There are no cabinets to store other foodstuff and no other equipment to cook them in.

Taking pride of place in her bedroom is the $800 bed her husband bought for her with their Progress Package payment a few months ago. Madam Lim suffers from polio and had struggled with a mattress she had been using earlier.

'All my memories of my husband are in this flat. We've lived here for 10 years. I don't intend to move even though I have some money. What is important is the children's education,' she said.