shingshing

This article is pretty long but its a nice reading material. Hope it lightens ya day. Cheers~

A. IT'S YOUR TURN:
Start Loving Yourself and Your Life

1. Whose Life is This, Anyway?
It's time to define your own reality and create the life that will make you happy. This is your life. Create your own standard to measure your success. Many of us have been brainwashed into believing society's definition of success: lots of money, a high-powered job, a picture-perfect family, a big extravagant home and a beautiful body. This might work for some people, but all too often we are left feeling dissatisfied, restless and sad. We can't all squeeze ourselves into the same mold, and we shouldn't want to. Take some time to figure out what you really want out of life and then develop a strategy to achieve it. Now let's begin with a few basic premises.

2. You Are a Unique Human Being. You Matter.
No one else is more important, worthy, or special than you. Just because someone is richer, more famous, or more attractive does not make them more valuable than you are. There is goodness and love in you. Do not treat your own physical, emotional, and spiritual health as an afterthought. Make your own well-being a priority. You deserve all the bounty this world has to offer. You are worth it.

3. Erase Negative Programming.
Do away with all the old, negative messages you were given about yourself. If someone has told you that you are worthless, undeserving, dense or unattractive, that is their problem. No one has a right to judge you or belittle you. We are all struggling to get by in this world, and no one else has all the answers. Honor your own truth. In your own heart, you know who you are . . . don't let another take that power away from you. Love yourself.

4. Forgive Yourself . . . and Move On.
Okay . . . so maybe you did screw up on a few things, maybe even on most things. Some of us have to learn the hard way. There are really no failures or mistakes, just opportunities for growth. Usually something good does come out of our mistakes. So learn from them, don't repeat them, forgive yourself, and move on.

5. Make Amends.
If you've hurt someone else in the process of learning your life lessons, make it right. Reach out to them, and tell them you are sorry. Or just start being nice. You are accountable for your behavior. Own up to it.

6. Nurture Yourself.
Be good to yourself. Be kind to yourself. Love yourself. If you are hurting or sad or lonely, honor that. Make time for yourself. Let yourself heal. Don't expect so much of yourself. Life can be downright brutal. Let the love within you and others carry you through. In time, you will see how much you have learned. It is worth the journey.


7. Everything in Life Happens for a Reason.
Life is full of peaks and valleys. Even though they are more difficult, you learn more during the valleys or the challenging times. When you are in a valley, you might not see the value of it; but later, when you look back, you will realize that you have learned a great deal. Know that nothing you experience is an accident. Everything you experience and everyone you meet teaches you something or holds a lesson for you.

8. Know That When One Door Closes, Another Opens.
Change is good. This is how you grow. Eventually you will see that sometimes you have to lose something to gain something else. Even illness, death, and financial loss have a purpose. Did a tragedy bring you closer to your family and friends? Did the community reach out to you? Were you forced to switch gears? Faith is knowing that everything is okay and works out. You will grow stronger from all that you experience.

9. Trust Your Instincts.
All your life, you have been taught to invalidate your feelings. This is wrong. Your subconscious mind continually picks up and processes cues from your environment and from other people. This is valuable information that you should not disregard. Don't let people talk you into doing something that doesn't feel right to you. Trust your gut. If something doesn't feel right to you, then it probably isn't. And you don't have to justify how you feel. Just say, "No thank you," or "I'd rather not," or "I'm busy." Everyone else does not know more than you.

10. Being Alive Is Enough.
Just ask people who almost lost their lives and they will tell you that most of the stuff we fret over isn't that important. Being alive is a great gift. Don't define yourself in such narrow terms as your work, your body, your house, your kids, or your relationships. Learn to see what is precious around you each day. Do not take your good fortune for granted. Be thankful and humble. You do not have to justify your life with a big list of accomplishments. Try to experience just being alive.


11. Love Your Body.
It houses your spirit; it gets you what you need. Appreciate what your body can do and stop focusing on what it can't. No one else's body would be better for you. (Being thinner or better looking is not more valuable.) If you are not the most stunning person in town, then perhaps this makes you more approachable to others. Even if you have a physical disability, there is a reason for this. It is not to cause you suffering, rather it is an opportunity for you to grow or to understand or appreciate something in life. Perhaps this will be the vehicle through which you meet a kindred spirit or discover some hidden talent within you. Be at peace and trust that your soul is beautiful and so are you.


B. LIVING IN THE PRESENT MOMENT

12. Enjoy the Beautiful Day.
What is the weather like? Is it hot? Rainy? Windy? Enjoy getting where you are going. Are you walking, driving, riding a bus? Are people talking, music playing, birds singing? Take notice of the colors, smells, textures, buildings, sounds, people . . . everything around you. Take pleasure in the freedom you have to go from place to place. Stop and smell the roses. This day will not happen again. Experience it. Take pleasure in the moment. It's great to be alive.

13. Enjoy Feeling Fine.
Remember when you had a toothache, the flu, or a migraine. Remember the relief you felt when you first started to feel better? Until we are sick, we rarely appreciate how good it feels to feel well. Be glad you are well.

14. Having a Rotten Day?
Things not going as planned? Try another approach, or do something else for a while. Have a good laugh over it. It's the wacky days that make the best stories, not the smooth days. Often, something more valuable comes out of unplanned experiences. Maybe this is the day you will meet a special new friend, gain a new insight, or learn to relax and not have to be in control.

15. Lighten Up and Put Things in Perspective.
Having a mini-crisis? Is the world crashing down around you? Hey, relax. First of all, panicking never solved anything. Second, most things are not that bad in hindsight. You're tougher than you think. You'll get through this, and you'll probably learn something valuable in the process. You'll be okay!

16. Take Action to Make Your Dreams Happen.
What do you want to do that you haven't made time for? Do you want to take a painting class, write a book, dye your hair, take a trip, run a marathon? What's stopping you? Probably you. Too busy? Hey, with that attitude, you'll never get around to it. So make time. Make yourself a priority for once. Make a list of things you'd like to try, and sign yourself up for something or call and make reservations. Just do it! Now get going. (And if you think it's too late to start something new, Grandmas Moses was in her eighties when she started painting. But don't you wait that long.)


C. THE POWER OF POSITIVE THINKING

17. Is Your Cup Half Full or Half Empty?
If you approach each day with a smile, see the goodness in people, and make lemonade out of lemons, then you are a "half-full person." You don't care if it's going to rain because the clouds are so beautiful. If you're stuck in traffic, you enjoy the music or your passenger's company. But if you approach your day with a negative attitude and notice or experience more bad than good, then your approach is half empty. You are your own worst enemy: you sabotage your own fun and your own joy of life. So cut it out. Retrain yourself to notice only the good things in any situation until you rid yourself of this horrible habit. Don't be a dream killer . . . for yourself or anyone else.

18. Let Yourself Be Happy. Count Your Blessings Every Day.
There is always someone else worse off than you. Look around you: your life is full of blessings. Make a list of things you are thankful for: your sight, health, family, food, shelter, a pet, your kids, friends, a good book. If you could even get out of bed this morning, then you are blessed. Do not take all this good fortune for granted. Be thankful for all these blessings.

19. Use Positive Language. Think Positive Thoughts.
Try not to use negative words too much like hate, disgusting, sick, ugly, etc." Notice how things have improved in the world, in your town, in your life. Look for beauty. Try not to be sarcastic. Sarcasm is a "put-down"of something or someone. The way you act in the world is basically a habit. You can retrain your behavior and your thinking, and you will benefit by doing so. Being considerate, kind, and positive is contagious and worth the investment.

20. What You Give Is What You Get.
If you give love and kindness to others, you will probably find yourself overflowing with love and happiness. But if you give bitterness, cynicism, and negativity, that is what you will attract. In the mirror of life, you are reflected back, so let your goodness shine out. (JE)

21. Notice the Positive Side of Life.
Even though we are surrounded with love and positive things every day, the negative side of life seems to get a lot more publicity. Too many negative images sap us of our optimism. So don't make a constant diet of negative people, newscasts, angry music, violent movies, and conflict. (Kids do not benefit from watching too many news shows and violence on TV.) Surround yourself with happy, positive people and situations whenever you can.

22. Be Funny. Laugh. Laugh Out Loud.
Laugh at yourself. Send funny cards to people. Watch funny movies. Enjoy yourself and have some fun (just not at anyone's expense). Laughter can cure what ails you and make life fun. It's very good medicine.

23. Sing Out Loud. Dance Wacky. Get Moving.
Kids love this one! Turn on some upbeat, peppy music nice and loud. Disney movie soundtracks and oldies are great for this; anything you know the words to. Not only will you release a lot of stress, you'll get your exercise, too.

24. Smile at Strangers and at Yourself.
Everyone is attracted to happy people. They make us feel better. You can be one of those people. You'll cheer up both yourself and those around you. Besides, frowning makes wrinkles.

D. CREATING MORE TIME AND MONEY
(AND GETTING ORGANIZED)

25. Create the Life You Want.
Don't just let life blow you around like a leaf in the wind. You can manage your time, money, and activities. First of all, who isn't overbooked these days? We fill our lives with so many activities that we practically live in the car, en route to one more event. So how does it feel? Exhausting? Unfulfilling? Frantic? You can change this pattern. You got yourself into it, now get yourself out. Take control and be deliberate. If you are thinking "How?" keep reading.

26. Reprioritize Your Time.
Start to keep track of what you do in a typical week. Do you work outside the home? Commute? Taxi kids back and forth? Chair or participate in committees, clubs, organizations? Take classes? Volunteer? Provide elder care or child care? Do you have shopping, menu planning, laundry? What are your obligations and commitments? What could be dropped, and what can't.

Now, get brutal here. Are all these activities enhancing or burdening your life? Some things you can't change, but most you can. Maybe you need to start out small, or maybe you need a giant life makeover. You decide. In any case, if you are not living the life you really want, then you have to make some changes, now. (JE)


27. Simplify and Be Deliberate.
Decide which activities in your life are valuable and which are not. Eliminate all the extra activities that take your time but do not enrich your life. Set limits for yourself and your family. SAY NO to burdensome committees or engagements. Allow your kids to each have one extra activity during the school year (unless they can get themselves there). If you have ten kids, then they will have to do an activity together. For example, they can all take the same art class or go swimming together. Kids suffer just like you do when every minute is booked up with activities. We all need more "down time," or unscheduled time in which to take up a hobby, read, or relax.

To put it all in perspective: if you moved away, would your community cease to function? If you quit your job, would your employer go out of business? You are not indispensable, and you are free to make choices for your own good.


28. Save Time with a Strategy. Get Help.
Can't get it all done? Did you eliminate some activities yet? Here are a few more suggestions: if you spend hours commuting to work, why not move closer to your job, or get another job closer to home? Hire a housekeeper, cleaning service, or gardener. Order your bulk groceries over the Internet. Have your kids take the school bus. Arrange carpools with friends. Hire an enthusiastic teenager to watch your kids while you clean the kitchen. (Pay these kids well,they deserve it.) Join a dinner co-op, or swap dinners with friends. Double recipes and freeze half for later. Figure out what chores you least like, and find a way to minimize them. All kinds of services are springing up out there to help families. For example, laundromats often wash and fold. Maybe you just need some help on occasion. If your job is not worth it, maybe you can provide a service for others who work outside the home. Child care providers, dog walkers, housekeepers, and elder caregivers are in big demand. How about home-delivered dinners? All those frantic working people out there need help.

29. Don't Burn the Candle at Both Ends.
You can't do it all, and you don't have to. Others will probably pick up the ball if you drop it. And if they don't, it won't be the end of the world. Keeping up a frantic pace puts people in the hospital, or else their relationships suffer. Something or someone will pay the price.


30. Budget Time to Do Nothing.
You don't have to fill every minute with some activity. Nothing spontaneous can happen if you're all booked up. Sit outside for a few minutes, or listen to some music. Let your mind unwind. If you're a real control freak, schedule some time to do nothing.

31. Turn Off the TV.
Some people find they have more time and can be better organized when the TV is off.


32. The Stuff Trap.
Most people have too much stuff. Some of us have it lying all over the place or stuffed in our closets. Others have it boxed up for future use (never to be seen again). Saving it just in case we might need it sometime is generally a bad reason. We usually don't need it, can't find it, or don't even remember we have it. So don't buy another thing until you read #33. Okay?

33. Dejunk, Unclutter, Weed Out, and Organize Your Home.
You'll have more room, spend less time looking for lost stuff, and your home will be much easier to clean. You'll feel more rested, tranquil, and happier. When people drop by, you won't have to hide. You might be shocked when you start to realize how much money you have spent on useless stuff you don't even want anymore. Give it away. Your old stuff might be useful to someone else.


34. How to Get Started at Dejunking.
First of all, do not be intimidated by a huge mess. There's an epidemic of junk junkies out there, so don't feel bad. Plan to spend a considerable amount of time on this project if your mess is big. You want to keep at it, too. Be determined; your sanity is worth it. Play the "Rocky" theme song if you have to.

Some people start with their junk drawer or closet. I say start with your living room and public rooms because you will see results faster. Get three big boxes (or trash bags). Mark them: "Give Away", "Throw Away", and "Undecided." Now put all items in their proper place in your house or in one of your boxes. You can have a garage sale and make some money. Start giving more stuff away all the time. Some people make a trip to their local charity every week. People will love your generosity. You'll feel freer and freer as you start to see some space returning to your home. And your stuff will no longer own you . . . you'll own it!

About that undecided box . . . time to get rid of that stuff. too.


35. Want More Money? Quit Buying Stuff.
Get out of the materialism rat race. Advertising has convinced us that we need a ton of stuff. Then, when we have it, all we do is trip over it. "In fashion" is a big hook for a lot of us. Be much more selective. And sort first. For all you know, you might have one of those in the closet already.


36. What Do You Really Need?
Besides some self-control . . . do you really need a new, expensive car; a big new house; a new CD player; and all the latest electronic gadgets known to humankind? You really can live without most of those things, especially if you are trying to save money. Eating out and vacations (try camping) are big money pits, too. So if you spend all your time working and not enjoying life, just so you can buy stuff, then whoa--- slow way down and reprioritize. Work less, spend less, enjoy more.

37. Are You a Shopaholic?
This sounds funny but really isn't. You know how much money you are spending, and you still feel miserable. You are trying to fill up a hole in your soul. It's like any other addiction, so feed your spirit. Seek professional help if necessary. Get help because you deserve it and you've suffered enough.


38. Don't Spend More Money than You Have.
Cut up those credit cards. You know that the instant gratification is not worth the stress. If you keep one credit card for convenience or emergencies, charge only what you can pay off each month.

shingshing

E. RELAX, HAVE FUN, AND ENJOY LIFE

39. Take a Nice, Hot Bath.
If you like bubble bath, special soaps, or candles, indulge yourself. This quiet time is great for your spirit and your brain. We all crave a bit of serenity, and in this hectic world, it is a rare commodity. A tub can be a wonderful place to read (just not a library book). Your muscles will love it, and so will your blood pressure.

40. Climb into Bed Early and Watch a Movie.
Make popcorn, pile up the pillows and relax. If you want to, you can let your kids join you for a family movie. How about a comedy? Just don't make it too scary; since you'll want to sleep sometime.

41. Use or Display Your Good China, Heirlooms and Treasures Daily.
Are your most beautiful and special things packed away? Do you use them only on special occasions? Why not use them daily and really enjoy them? So what if they get broken? They won't do you any good packed in your attic. If you are always putting off the special things in life, you might miss the opportunity ever to experience them at all. Surrounding yourself with beautiful things will lift your spirits, and remind you that your life is a special occasion.

42. Make Time to Take Up a Hobby or Be Creative.
Make birdhouses, draw, play music, learn a language, build models, doodle, take a class, take up a sport, try out for local theater, write poetry, make mosaics, rebuild old cars, string beads. Some adult education classes cost $10 or less. Everyone has a hidden talent. Developing it is cheaper than therapy and a lot more fun. Consider joining a club for your hobby or interest. It's a great way to meet people, too.

43. READ, READ, READ!!!
Mysteries, novels, self-help books, inspirational books, humor, travel, poetry, adventure. There is a book for every age, taste, level, and person on this planet. If you are already a reader, then you know how great it is. If you aren't, then you simply have not found the right type of book. Books relax you and transport you to another world right in your own living room. Hooray for books!


44. Did Someone Turn You Off to Reading?
The old school approach to reading could have killed anyone's love of it. Boring, tedious, and difficult books do not inspire reading. If you were a slow reader or felt pressured, you certainly wouldn't have learned to love books. So deprogram yourself, starting today. Start with an easy, funny, or exciting book. Pick a subject you enjoy. Give yourself all the time in the world, and start to read for pleasure. Jurassic Park by Michael Crichton was one of the first books that turned me on to pleasure reading. Dave Barry's Guide to Guys is fast and funny, too.

45. Beautify Your Home.
Your home should give you a lift, boost your spirits, and express your uniqueness. It is a very important refuge and anchor for you (and your family) in these hectic times. Let it reflect your sense of style and the colors you like. Even if you are on a budget, you can paint the walls, hang up some curtains, and put up some art or posters. You can find lots of great stuff at garage sales. Look at books and magazines for ideas, or ask a creative friend to help if you're lost. "Interior Motives," hosted by Christopher Lowell on the Discovery Channel, is full of clever tips.

46. Move Your Furniture.
This will give you an instant change and won't cost you a penny---unless, of course, you throw your back out---so be careful.


47. Create an Outdoor Retreat.
Whether you have a tiny deck or you have ten acres, set up a spot with a comfy chair or two, a small table, and a few flowers or plants. Take your coffee, soda, journal, paper, or book outside. Soak up the day. Give yourself permission to relax. If we pay a lot of money to go on a vacation just to sit around by the pool or beach, then why can't we enjoy an afternoon at our own home for free? Tip: Many of the bigger chain stores carry reasonably priced vinyl Adirondack chairs, and other outdoor furniture.


48. Get Outdoors into Nature.
Nature is a natural destresser. Go out to the woods, lake, or sea. Go for a picnic in a park, take a walk, sit under a tree. Go anyplace where it is not too crowded and noisy. Let your mind wander away from everyday problems.


49. Go Camping.
Camping refreshes your spirit. Being surrounded by natural beauty from morning to night and the relaxed pace can transform anyone who will surrender to just being. If you are a high-strung control freak, you will probably consider camping torture, but chances are you will benefit from it more than anyone else. It takes about three days to get used to having no TV, computer, phone, etc. You will slowly start to unwind and relax, and soon you will find yourself just sitting in a chair and not missing any of it. Many kids will go through withdrawal from the TV, but after a few days, they will become camping converts. Kids love to roast marshmallows and sticks. A campfire is great for this. Camping is also great for stargazing When else do you get out into the night air? It takes some practice to learn about tents and stoves and other camping details, but after a few tries you'll become an expert. Family bonding magically happens in nature.


50. Plant a Garden.
Working in the garden or yard is very therapeutic. It doesn't matter if your garden is ornamental or vegetable, big or small. Just the acts of digging, raking, and tending take your mind off daily problems. You can get creative and start to add paths, ponds, fences, decks, benches, art, birdhouses, bat-houses, etc. Rocks are a wonderful feature, too. The wonder of nature can reveal itself to you in your own mini-universe, which unfolds every time you work with plants. Container garden-ing is just as satisfying. If you feed the hummingbirds, get advice from the experts, as feeders can become contaminated.

51. Stretch a Bit.
We all get in a rut; it's invigorating to try something new. Re-invent yourself. Try a new food or restaurant. Get a new haircut or glasses. Take up in-line skating. Teach yourself to use tools and make some of your own repairs. Build. Try on some new ideas. Don't stereotype or limit yourself. You are capable. Become empowered.


52. Who Cares If You Have a Messy Kitchen?
Clean is nice, but don't let it rule your life. Reading to your kids is more valuable. Establish priorities for a full life. Don't let the business of maintaining your life become your whole life.


53. Enjoy the Trip.
When traveling as a family, make the journey fun and also part of the vacation. Play music loud and sing. Kids love Disney soundtracks. Play a different one for each trip. Stock up on yummy drinks and treats. Play animal guessing games. Make stops along the way to eat or see something interesting. In this busy world, it is rare to get all your family together in one place. Enjoy it!


54. Start Your Own Traditions.
Create your own special occasions. Have an annual Christmas luncheon for all your friends. Throw a beach party. Have a ladies' (or gentlemen's) night out. Have a family reunion with your siblings every year. Serve Thanksgiving dinner in September. Ask your friends what they do. Borrow their ideas.


55. Pamper Yourself.
Get a manicure. Take a nap. Get your car washed. Treat yourself to a latte. Buy a new pen. Look at funny greeting cards and buy a few to send later. Take a walk. Visit a museum. Write a letter. Read an inspirational book. Write in your journal. Buy some beautiful flowers. You deserve it. What do you do for your own enjoyment?


F. RELATIONSHIPS

56. Do Not Expect Others to Bring You Happiness.
All by yourself, you are a complete and perfect creation. All the answers you need are within you. Do your spirit work. Nurture, cherish, honor, and feed your spirit. Another person cannot fill a hole in your soul that exists if you do not love yourself. Reach out to help others. Extend love to them. Give, and you will receive.

57. Make Friends and Be a Friend.
Don't sulk because your friends don't call. Everyone is busy. Call them; they will really appreciate it. Make different kinds of friends. And they don't have to be friends with each other. Join a book club, PTA, church group, sport, volunteer group. Just get out there and meet people.


58. Extend Yourself (Go Out of Your Way for Others).
Call someone who is lonely or sad. Take a friend to lunch. Bring flowers to someone. Open the door when a person needs help. Let someone go in front of you in the market when they are in a hurry. Stop for pedestrians. Be patient and considerate. Don't take it personally when another person is a grump . . . maybe they just got bad news or they are sick. Be the good guy. You'll love yourself.


59. Be Friendly and Kind to Teenagers.
Teenagers are unfairly treated by the media. Most of them are just little kids in really loud, big bodies. Because their bodies are growing and changing so fast, they often feel depressed, confused and out of control. Teens need more love and reassurance than any other age group, yet as a society, we treat them like they have some contagious disease. They don't want to be teenagers . . . that's just life. So why not show them some support? Give them the benefit of the doubt. Be pleasant to them. Say hello, and give them a smile or kind word. Most of these kids are really wonderful even with a nose ring. One more thing; when your little, darling six-year-old son or granddaughter is sixteen, would you like them to be treated inconsiderately?

60. Do Not Gossip.
We all do stupid things. Your importance is not increased when you belittle another. Gossiping is petty, hurtful and low. Try doing something nice for someone else instead. You'll feel better about yourself.


61. Do Not Carry a Grudge.
Generally speaking, most of the bad things people do to one another are just a little thoughtless or careless. Some people are on automatic pilot and do not even realize that they have hurt another. Most of the time, it is probably not intentional. Do not take it to heart. Be the bigger person; sometimes you can actually end up becoming friends. Realize that you have done dumb things before, too. In any case, it is destructive to your own peace of mind to carry negative thoughts around in your heart. They will eat away at you, and eventually, you will pay a dear price.


62. Look Out for Toxic People.
You know the type. They complain, are negative in their outlook, are unkind, depressed, mean, and self-centered. They will suck the joy right out of you, and you can't fix them. They are the only ones who can resolve their issues. Protect your own well-being by avoiding their destructive and negative energy. Don't be a victim.


63. You Cannot Solve Other People's Problems.
People will come to you with their tales of woe. You can offer them kindness or be a sounding board for them, but they are really the only ones who can solve things for themselves. You cannot travel their journey for them; we must each walk our own path.


64. Do Not Let Another Person Crush Your Spirit.
Some people are hostile, negative or angry all the time. If you live or work with someone like this, it can destroy your spirit. You begin to feel hopeless and defeated. You deserve better. Do not let these people trick you into thinking that you are the cause of their difficulties. Negative people need to take ownership of their own emotional baggage, problems, and issues. You have a right to be happy. You deserve it. You will reflect God's grace when you are happy. You will spread joy and radiate love. Don't let anyone take that away from you.


65. Keep Your Own Free Will.
We all have responsibilities and obligations. We can't always do exactly what we want or get our own way. Some of this is good because we are growing and learning how to cope. But if you feel your own needs are never being met, or you are feeling devalued, or if you have to give in to another's wishes more than to your own, then that relationship is probably destructive to you. You do not deserve to be mistreated by anyone.


66. Look Beyond a Person's Actions and Try to See Their Goodness
Some people are hurting and sad, and they act like jerks. Most people don't want to act jerky; in fact, they probably hate it and themselves. If you can see that spark of goodness in them, then you will be free of being hurt by them. Can you reach out to them with kindness and see how far it gets you? Maybe there is a wonderful person inside of them struggling to get out, and you just might help open that door. (Note: If a person is abusive to you, that is not okay. Leave that situation immediately.)


67. Don't Let Anger Take Over in an Argument.
You'll regret what you say; and you will resolve nothing. Everyone will shut down. So keep a cool head. If necessary, detach yourself. Don't take anything personally, and try to reach a resolution or compromise. "When anger enters, reason flies out the window." (JE)


68. Women: Don't Expect Men to Think Like You.
They can't. Don't take it personally.

69. Tips for Men about Women.
Women love to talk and analyze. Force yourself to talk to the woman in your life. Make conversation. Try not to shut down or leave when you feel uncomfortable or upset. Talk about it; don't be so afraid of your feminine side. Having a macho attitude does not work as well as being better balanced. Hint: Women love to receive flowers. (They don't have to be roses. Most women like all flowers.)

70. Have People Over.
We're all so busy that we don't entertain much anymore, but we need to maintain our friendships. We all need a support system and friends provide this. So have a potluck once in awhile. Everyone else will thank you for the effort, but they actually will be bringing all the food! It's not that hard.