Do you do that, or your maid does??

**deedee** · 18-10-2006, 10:11 PM

IT’S THE MAID’S JOB!
FRANCES ONG HOCK LIN

A TUTOR was giving tuition in a home when she observed that her student did not flush the toilet after he used it. His father said it was the maid job’s to flush the toilet.

In another incident, a group of Secondary 1 students were washing up after going sailing. The teacher observed that one student did not turn off the tap after using it. His explanation was that at home, it was the maid’s job to do so after he had taken a bath. And of course, some of us have come across young National Service recruits who do not know how to lace up their boots because they have never learnt how to put their shoes on.

Surely, I joke?

No, the stories are true.

While a maid is a lifeline to many families, perhaps it’s time to ask if things have gone over the line.

Many women continue to go to work because the maids have taken over the role of a homemaker. Sometimes, the maids take over the home so completely that family members do not know where things are kept.

Some maids have also taken over the role of bringing up the children, so much so that the kids are traumatised when the maid is sent away.

Where do we draw the line? Should the maid be expected to flush the toilet after we use it? What about waking her up at 2am, as some have been known to do, to make supper for a hungry family member?

Sometimes, we forget that the maid is also a human being in need of encouragement and dignified treatment.

A local pastor was asked to leave a church after advocating that the faithful give their maid a Sunday off as it is a day of rest.

But unless we change the way we relate to our maids, we are in real danger of producing a generation of children who are selfish and look down on the littlest of menial jobs.

An indication of this trend can be observed in many classrooms in Singapore. In the past, classes had a duty roster whereby students took turns to do cleaning jobs — be it sweeping or clearing the rubbish bin.

Ask any teacher now and likely, he or she will tell you that it is getting tougher to make students do these simple tasks. Sometimes students retort: “Why should I?”

Once I heard this argument from a student. He said that since his father pays income tax, the school can employ cleaners to clean the classroom.

When our three teenagers were growing up, we did not have a maid till they were in primary school. They were sent to a daycare centre where they learnt to bathe themselves. They had to pack their towel and a change of clothes every day, and they even had to make their own breakfast.

Even now, although we have a maid, we still train our kids to look after the youngest, a one-year-old.

They know how to bathe him, change his diapers and make milk for him. They know how to cook and wash plates and if the maid were to pack up and go, they would be able to look after the house.

The maid is our helper who is there to make our life more comfortable; she is neither a surrogate parent nor a slave.

Unless we learn to treat her with respect, our children will not be able to learn to show respect to others.

Do we want to turn our children into little emperors?

The writer is a mother of six and an educator.
Do you agree with this contributor?
Email us at news@newstoday.com.sg

Source: Today

Pansies won’t make us bloom
Wednesday • October 18, 2006

Teens forced maid to clear their soiled sanitary pads
Letter from Haslinda Shamsudin

I READ with interest Frances Ong's "It's the maid's job!" (Oct 17).

I am not surprised at her accounts of how our children are leaving everything to the maid — flushing the toilet, turning off the tap, and so on.

I have heard stories from maids in my estate about what they were made to do.

In one home, the teenage daughters of the employer left their soiled sanitary pads for their maid to clear. When the poor maid advised the girls to clear the soiled pads themselves, they told her off and said she should pick up after them, as it was her job to keep the house clean.

Another maid said that before she flew off for home leave, there was some leftover rice in the cooker. She served breakfast to the family, whose four children are teenagers.

When she returned to Singapore two weeks later, the cups of Milo and coffee and plates of leftovers had been left unwashed in the kitchen sink — the drink residue dried and hardened in the cups, the food mouldy and the rice in the cooker smelly. Apparently, the family had waited for her to return to wash these.

In such cases, I feel that things had indeed gone over the line with regard to what a maid should be expected to do.

I agree that employers should change the way they relate to their maids.

If parents look down on their maid and treat her like a slave, their children will do the same.

If parents don't even wash their own cups, their children will follow suit.

Parents should set a good example, educate their children to respect and treat the maid as a helper, and teach them to perform simple household chores.

Time to take responsibility for our own offspring
Letter from Quek Meng-Chong

IT IS a sad state of affairs when, in the race to be a First World nation, we forget that the important things in life are not measured in dollars and cents.

Let's not bring up the usual arguments about the high cost of living that requires both parents to work or the effects of this on society.

A child — until he or she reaches maturity — is the responsibility of the parents and, to a degree, the extended family.

The buck stops there. Whoever considers outsourcing the parenting responsibility to the maid, school, police, government or society, ought to seriously reconsider having children.

If the trend of having maids as the primary caregivers and educators continues, how will the next few generations of Singaporeans be able to compete in a working world that is becoming increasing mobile and moving further from the comforts of home?

Get children used to working from an early age
Letter from Jeffrey Law Lee Beng

YOUNG people should be accustomed to physical labour from the first years, or they could turn into a generation expecting society to provide them with more than they themselves are ready to contribute.

Doing simple household chores such as sweeping the floor and cleaning the table are now being postponed until these young people complete their education — and in some cases, until they start working!

It is no wonder that today's teenagers have the notion that they have "better things" to do — such as to study hard and climb the career ladder — and that housework is only meant for their parents or maids.

In this light, it would be beneficial to find ways to provide teenagers with jobs during the school vacation.

On reining in the kids and losing the household reins
Letter from Lee Yin May

IT IS no wonder that some maids are not allowed any days off, if they have to be there to flush the toilets or turn off taps left running!

I have heard from maids that they have to serve the children food with both hands. Some were kicked by their charges while trying to separate them in a fight. And other children asked the maids for money when the latter received their salaries.

What values are being taught to the children?

On the other hand, someone once told me that a maid, who had worked 13 years for the same family, was the one the children asked for permission to go out with friends.

Had her employers lost their stand in the house because they had not bothered to bond with their children or had not bothered how the house was run?

Source: Today

**jerbelle** · 18-10-2006, 10:17 PM

aiyo, understand some kids are very dependant, but flush toilet also need maids??

funnysnow · 18-10-2006, 11:12 PM

It really an upsetting news. People are treating the maid as a slave. For me, I used to have maid. Changing of maids so many times due to performance till my mum don't trust maid anymore (family matter). Anyway, back to my story. I used to have maid, but I still independent myself. While my younger sister was like princess, she want my maid to serve her. She can call out maid and ask the maid to come over to take things for her which is few steps away from her only.(But now she is very independent)

While for me. As long she did her job, I dont require her to do anything. She cannot touch my stuffs or tidy my stuffs. Cos my stuffs are left everywhere in the sense I know where to put my things. I admit I used to vent anger at her whenever I lost my things, in fact, I vent at all my family members.. LOL!

People should change their mindset. Maid are to help to lessen to workload in the house. But people push EVERYTHING to the maids. These people should be more independent. The maid are merely paid less than half the amount we teenage can earn as full-time. And they are on their 24hours except sleeping hours. Singaporean, live good life dont know how to control

**Igtenos** · 18-10-2006, 11:33 PM

Wows thats the Voices section in Today 's newspapers.
Anyways kids are too pampered to do any stuff. All depend on maid blah blah, even adults also yell at the maid at the very slightest thing.

funnysnow · 18-10-2006, 11:51 PM

This is because adult want to make full use of the maid as they are paid. So they really use them FULLY.

**deedee** · 19-10-2006, 07:10 AM

i never had maid at home and because of this, i told my bf i wish we will never have maids.

firstly i won't be used to it. secondly i may not trust her no matter how good she can be, cos i just cannot get used to the idea and there are horror stories of maids ill-treating the kids when couples not at home. and thirdly i won't want my kids to be too dependent on maids, like these spoilt brats!!!

treating the poor maids like some kinda slaves... they should feel ashamed of themselves.

**germaine** · 19-10-2006, 11:07 AM

huh?? even flushin the toilet oso req the maid to do it!! so spolit lorz.. i dun have maid at home.. but these kind of tinks shld do it yourself mahz..
i oso wont employ maids lorz.. later my kids wil b veri dependent on them.. somemore they might become closer den mi to the kids.. haha

funnysnow · 19-10-2006, 12:17 PM

These kids are simply being too spoilt

**fuyumi** · 19-10-2006, 03:32 PM

Firstly I don't hire maids and I realised that humans do turn lazy once they have help.

**.phoenixity.** · 19-10-2006, 03:36 PM

sigh. people nowadays. maids are also humans. >_<

the bad side of singapore i absolutely hate arg!

funnysnow · 19-10-2006, 03:39 PM

	Quote:			Originally Posted by fuyumi
	Firstly I don't hire maids and I realised that humans do turn lazy once they have help.

True.. I agree on that..

18-10-2006, 10:11 PM	#1 (permalink)
deedee deedeelicious Join Date: Oct 2006 Posts: 565 iTrader: (0) Gender: Zodiac Sign: Country: Location: West SGC$: 91.30 Bank: 0.00 Total SGC$: 91.30	Do you flush the toilet after usage, or your maid does?? IT’S THE MAID’S JOB! FRANCES ONG HOCK LIN A TUTOR was giving tuition in a home when she observed that her student did not flush the toilet after he used it. His father said it was the maid job’s to flush the toilet. In another incident, a group of Secondary 1 students were washing up after going sailing. The teacher observed that one student did not turn off the tap after using it. His explanation was that at home, it was the maid’s job to do so after he had taken a bath. And of course, some of us have come across young National Service recruits who do not know how to lace up their boots because they have never learnt how to put their shoes on. Surely, I joke? No, the stories are true. While a maid is a lifeline to many families, perhaps it’s time to ask if things have gone over the line. Many women continue to go to work because the maids have taken over the role of a homemaker. Sometimes, the maids take over the home so completely that family members do not know where things are kept. Some maids have also taken over the role of bringing up the children, so much so that the kids are traumatised when the maid is sent away. Where do we draw the line? Should the maid be expected to flush the toilet after we use it? What about waking her up at 2am, as some have been known to do, to make supper for a hungry family member? Sometimes, we forget that the maid is also a human being in need of encouragement and dignified treatment. A local pastor was asked to leave a church after advocating that the faithful give their maid a Sunday off as it is a day of rest. But unless we change the way we relate to our maids, we are in real danger of producing a generation of children who are selfish and look down on the littlest of menial jobs. An indication of this trend can be observed in many classrooms in Singapore. In the past, classes had a duty roster whereby students took turns to do cleaning jobs — be it sweeping or clearing the rubbish bin. Ask any teacher now and likely, he or she will tell you that it is getting tougher to make students do these simple tasks. Sometimes students retort: “Why should I?” Once I heard this argument from a student. He said that since his father pays income tax, the school can employ cleaners to clean the classroom. When our three teenagers were growing up, we did not have a maid till they were in primary school. They were sent to a daycare centre where they learnt to bathe themselves. They had to pack their towel and a change of clothes every day, and they even had to make their own breakfast. Even now, although we have a maid, we still train our kids to look after the youngest, a one-year-old. They know how to bathe him, change his diapers and make milk for him. They know how to cook and wash plates and if the maid were to pack up and go, they would be able to look after the house. The maid is our helper who is there to make our life more comfortable; she is neither a surrogate parent nor a slave. Unless we learn to treat her with respect, our children will not be able to learn to show respect to others. Do we want to turn our children into little emperors? The writer is a mother of six and an educator. Do you agree with this contributor? Email us at news@newstoday.com.sg Source: Today Pansies won’t make us bloom Wednesday • October 18, 2006 Teens forced maid to clear their soiled sanitary pads Letter from Haslinda Shamsudin I READ with interest Frances Ong's "It's the maid's job!" (Oct 17). I am not surprised at her accounts of how our children are leaving everything to the maid — flushing the toilet, turning off the tap, and so on. I have heard stories from maids in my estate about what they were made to do. In one home, the teenage daughters of the employer left their soiled sanitary pads for their maid to clear. When the poor maid advised the girls to clear the soiled pads themselves, they told her off and said she should pick up after them, as it was her job to keep the house clean. Another maid said that before she flew off for home leave, there was some leftover rice in the cooker. She served breakfast to the family, whose four children are teenagers. When she returned to Singapore two weeks later, the cups of Milo and coffee and plates of leftovers had been left unwashed in the kitchen sink — the drink residue dried and hardened in the cups, the food mouldy and the rice in the cooker smelly. Apparently, the family had waited for her to return to wash these. In such cases, I feel that things had indeed gone over the line with regard to what a maid should be expected to do. I agree that employers should change the way they relate to their maids. If parents look down on their maid and treat her like a slave, their children will do the same. If parents don't even wash their own cups, their children will follow suit. Parents should set a good example, educate their children to respect and treat the maid as a helper, and teach them to perform simple household chores. Time to take responsibility for our own offspring Letter from Quek Meng-Chong IT IS a sad state of affairs when, in the race to be a First World nation, we forget that the important things in life are not measured in dollars and cents. Let's not bring up the usual arguments about the high cost of living that requires both parents to work or the effects of this on society. A child — until he or she reaches maturity — is the responsibility of the parents and, to a degree, the extended family. The buck stops there. Whoever considers outsourcing the parenting responsibility to the maid, school, police, government or society, ought to seriously reconsider having children. If the trend of having maids as the primary caregivers and educators continues, how will the next few generations of Singaporeans be able to compete in a working world that is becoming increasing mobile and moving further from the comforts of home? Get children used to working from an early age Letter from Jeffrey Law Lee Beng YOUNG people should be accustomed to physical labour from the first years, or they could turn into a generation expecting society to provide them with more than they themselves are ready to contribute. Doing simple household chores such as sweeping the floor and cleaning the table are now being postponed until these young people complete their education — and in some cases, until they start working! It is no wonder that today's teenagers have the notion that they have "better things" to do — such as to study hard and climb the career ladder — and that housework is only meant for their parents or maids. In this light, it would be beneficial to find ways to provide teenagers with jobs during the school vacation. On reining in the kids and losing the household reins Letter from Lee Yin May IT IS no wonder that some maids are not allowed any days off, if they have to be there to flush the toilets or turn off taps left running! I have heard from maids that they have to serve the children food with both hands. Some were kicked by their charges while trying to separate them in a fight. And other children asked the maids for money when the latter received their salaries. What values are being taught to the children? On the other hand, someone once told me that a maid, who had worked 13 years for the same family, was the one the children asked for permission to go out with friends. Had her employers lost their stand in the house because they had not bothered to bond with their children or had not bothered how the house was run? Source: Today ♡ ♡ ♡ ♡ ♡ ♡ ♡ ♡ ♡ ♡ ♡ ♡ ♡ ♡ ♡ I'm a fat ass, motivate me! ♡ ♡ ♡ ♡ ♡ ♡ ♡ ♡ ♡ ♡ ♡ ♡ ♡ ♡ ♡ Last edited by deedee : 18-10-2006 at 10:18 PM.

18-10-2006, 11:12 PM	#3 (permalink)
funnysnow Experienced SGClubber Join Date: Nov 2004 Posts: 8,394 iTrader: (1) Gender: Zodiac Sign: Country: Location: Singapore SGC$: 794.36 Bank: 0.17 Total SGC$: 794.53	It really an upsetting news. People are treating the maid as a slave. For me, I used to have maid. Changing of maids so many times due to performance till my mum don't trust maid anymore (family matter). Anyway, back to my story. I used to have maid, but I still independent myself. While my younger sister was like princess, she want my maid to serve her. She can call out maid and ask the maid to come over to take things for her which is few steps away from her only.(But now she is very independent) While for me. As long she did her job, I dont require her to do anything. She cannot touch my stuffs or tidy my stuffs. Cos my stuffs are left everywhere in the sense I know where to put my things. I admit I used to vent anger at her whenever I lost my things, in fact, I vent at all my family members.. LOL! People should change their mindset. Maid are to help to lessen to workload in the house. But people push EVERYTHING to the maids. These people should be more independent. The maid are merely paid less than half the amount we teenage can earn as full-time. And they are on their 24hours except sleeping hours. Singaporean, live good life dont know how to control To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 10 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.

18-10-2006, 11:51 PM	#5 (permalink)
funnysnow Experienced SGClubber Join Date: Nov 2004 Posts: 8,394 iTrader: (1) Gender: Zodiac Sign: Country: Location: Singapore SGC$: 794.36 Bank: 0.17 Total SGC$: 794.53	This is because adult want to make full use of the maid as they are paid. So they really use them FULLY. To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 10 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.

19-10-2006, 07:10 AM	#6 (permalink)
deedee deedeelicious Join Date: Oct 2006 Posts: 565 iTrader: (0) Gender: Zodiac Sign: Country: Location: West SGC$: 91.30 Bank: 0.00 Total SGC$: 91.30	i never had maid at home and because of this, i told my bf i wish we will never have maids. firstly i won't be used to it. secondly i may not trust her no matter how good she can be, cos i just cannot get used to the idea and there are horror stories of maids ill-treating the kids when couples not at home. and thirdly i won't want my kids to be too dependent on maids, like these spoilt brats!!! treating the poor maids like some kinda slaves... they should feel ashamed of themselves. ♡ ♡ ♡ ♡ ♡ ♡ ♡ ♡ ♡ ♡ ♡ ♡ ♡ ♡ ♡ I'm a fat ass, motivate me! ♡ ♡ ♡ ♡ ♡ ♡ ♡ ♡ ♡ ♡ ♡ ♡ ♡ ♡ ♡ Last edited by deedee : 19-10-2006 at 11:11 AM.

19-10-2006, 12:17 PM	#8 (permalink)
funnysnow Experienced SGClubber Join Date: Nov 2004 Posts: 8,394 iTrader: (1) Gender: Zodiac Sign: Country: Location: Singapore SGC$: 794.36 Bank: 0.17 Total SGC$: 794.53	These kids are simply being too spoilt To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 10 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.

18-10-2006, 10:17 PM	#2 (permalink)
jerbelle Registered Members Join Date: Oct 2006 Posts: 133 iTrader: (0) Gender: Zodiac Sign: Country: Location: Lavender SGC$: 310.00 Bank: 0.00 Total SGC$: 310.00	aiyo, understand some kids are very dependant, but flush toilet also need maids??

18-10-2006, 11:33 PM	#4 (permalink)
Igtenos Experienced SGClubber Join Date: Mar 2005 Posts: 1,366 iTrader: (0) My Mood: Gender: Zodiac Sign: Country: Location: Woodlands SGC$: 334.80 Bank: 0.00 Total SGC$: 334.80	Wows thats the Voices section in Today 's newspapers. Anyways kids are too pampered to do any stuff. All depend on maid blah blah, even adults also yell at the maid at the very slightest thing.

19-10-2006, 11:07 AM	#7 (permalink)
germaine Cool SGClubber Join Date: Oct 2006 Posts: 264 iTrader: (0) Gender: Zodiac Sign: Country: Location: bt merah SGC$: 672.00 Bank: 0.00 Total SGC$: 672.00	huh?? even flushin the toilet oso req the maid to do it!! so spolit lorz.. i dun have maid at home.. but these kind of tinks shld do it yourself mahz.. i oso wont employ maids lorz.. later my kids wil b veri dependent on them.. somemore they might become closer den mi to the kids.. haha

19-10-2006, 03:32 PM	#9 (permalink)
fuyumi Ice Princess Join Date: Oct 2006 Posts: 5,209 iTrader: (28) My Mood: Gender: Zodiac Sign: Country: Location: Eastern Tranquinity SGC$: 111.30 Bank: 1,098.37 Total SGC$: 1,209.67	Firstly I don't hire maids and I realised that humans do turn lazy once they have help. To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 10 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.

19-10-2006, 03:36 PM	#10 (permalink)
.phoenixity. Moderator Join Date: Oct 2006 Posts: 3,784 iTrader: (6) My Mood: Gender: Zodiac Sign: Country: Location: Tampines SGC$: 58.25 Bank: 520.77 Total SGC$: 579.02	sigh. people nowadays. maids are also humans. >_< the bad side of singapore i absolutely hate arg! To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 10 or greater. You currently have 0 posts. Woud you lie with me and just forget the world? ♥ To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 10 or greater. You currently have 0 posts. Do support the SGC Charity! To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 10 or greater. You currently have 0 posts. To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 10 or greater. You currently have 0 posts. Support me! To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 10 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.

19-10-2006, 04:00 PM	#12 (permalink)
teriyaki Mrs Kang-Park Join Date: Oct 2006 Posts: 7,795 iTrader: (10) My Mood: Gender: Zodiac Sign: Country: Location: lala land SGC$: 695.87 Bank: 14.62 Total SGC$: 710.49