Sages of old times have preached on how to be happy by being true to our self. It has been systematically researched and established that it is very simple to be happy. We need to do something we are happy doing. Only when we love what we are doing, we would be able to achieve success. We are here only to be happy and joyful. We are here to lead a life of fullness and prosperity. We are not here to be unhappy. Real happiness is achievable and if we follow certain simple steps and strive towards achieving them.
1. They find their most golden self
If you have to achieve true happiness, you need to picturise it in your mind. See yourself sitting amidst the green fields and enjoying the peaceful serenity encompassing it. This is true happiness and bliss. Sometimes, we are not able to appreciate small moments of happiness, we lose out on the smaller moments in our pursuit of bigger ones. Hence, every moment of your life has to be relished as if there is no tomorrow. Do what you love doing and see the difference. When you work with your heart, the work will be seen and it would be of best quality. Every individual who is on this earth has some or the other unique talents and it is important to bring out those talents. Aristotle has said that bringing out your unique talents is one of the noblest goals in anyone’s life. The Greeks felt that every child is God’s child and every child has been blessed at the time of birth. It is important that we realize our golden self meaning what our strengths are. Our personal strengths can be effectively cultivated for achieving personal growth. It is important that we use these talents and try taking on new challenges and responsibilities so that we are able to achieve what we desire in this life.
2. They design their lives to bring in joy
It has been established by David Schkade, a psychologist at the University of California that people overlook this very important fact of life. They do not think seriously on how to be happy in life, how to spend quality time and enjoy life too. Schkade and colleagues conducted a research on 900 working women and asked them to jot down things which they had performed one day before. After writing down all the things, on evaluation of the diaries, it was established that many of the women did things which they literally hated, but were forced to do it. They had no choice. Hence, it is important for us to decide what we like and what we love doing, in order to be happy. What we need to understand is that our happiness is within our control and not anyone else’s. Even making simple changes in your lifestyle or shifting of priorities would help. If you shift one hour of your time doing things which you hate doing to things you love doing, you are definitely going to bring about improvements in your life and you can be rest assured that you are on your way to the success path or on the path of happiness. Making small changes like spending your time with your friends, reading a book you have always wanted to read or listening to your favorite piece of music is going to make you happy. These are small changes which can easily be incorporated in your lifestyle. When you make a deliberate effort to make changes in your life, the changes would stay that way and you would be happy.
3. They avoid ‘if only’ fantasies
People think that only if they land up a job in a multinational company, they are going to be happy or if they are successful in losing weight, they would be happy. You cannot put conditions and be conditional about happiness. Happy people do not think this way and are not into this line of thinking.
Research has proven that we are not right in our predictions regarding happiness. We are not sure what is our contentment level and we start focusing on illusions and not reality. When a group of people were questioned and questions like how happy they were with their lives and how many dates they went on the previous month were put forth, people were comfortable with the 2nd question and weighed their happiness on fantasies.
Hence, we need to find something to be happy about in every new thing of new activity we pursue. We need to keep our lives looking out for something new, be it a new activity like yoga or diving.
4. They put best friends first
Man is a social animal and he likes socializing. Social engagement can be very helpful in raising our levels of happiness. Nature of relationship plays a very important role in our happiness. We are happy talking for hours together with our friends or with some of our close relatives with whom we are comfortable with. Just hanging out with your friends and even pouring out your heart to your friends helps and raises happiness levels. Just window shopping, roaming around in the mall, seeing movies together and having popcorn with friends gives joy to us.
5. They allow themselves to be happy
Many of us have these misconceptions in our mind that we are not supposed to be very happy. Deep down we have this wrong belief embedded in us that it is not right to be joyful. Hence, we feel guilty when we are having fun. There are also beliefs that we cannot take the liberty of being happy, unless we have taken care of people who are unhappy and are underfed, under clothed etc. The Dalai Lama has in many of his teachings and discourses said that you need to pursue both these simultaneously. Only happy people would be able to make others happy, because they spread positive energy around. Happy people make better citizens, better parents and better spouses. Autobiographies penned by nuns have established that nuns who have a positive attitude and who spread happiness and joy around lived longer by about 10 years compared to their counterparts. So it is high time that pessimists of the world allow a little of happiness into their lives so that they are able to spread the fragrance of happiness around.