Be it relationship benefits or cost, marriage always wins and has an upper hand over cohabitation.
Cohabitation lowers the pleasure of marriage
First, cohabitation lowers one’s chance of enjoying a marital status. Additionally cohabitors have a different view of time than married couples. In common terms marriage means that “ I live for your forever” and this increases the emotional benefits for both the persons involved in the marriage. In contrast cohabitation means, “I live with you only until the relationship meets my needs” and thus it is only short lived. When it comes to security, cohabiting couples are less secure than marrieds and they also don’t view sexual life as a permanent one. As a result of this, they are not loyal or faithful to their partner which is not the case in marriage. Though if they are faithful, they lack the commitment required in sexual bonding and thus create insecurity.
Negative effects on children
The children of cohabiting couples also carry the risk of teasing and abusing when they live without both their parents. It is also common that boyfriends will sexually or physically abuse their girlfriend’s children. Due to these treatments, these children face some behavioral problems and are also poor in academics when compared to the children of married couples. Cohabiting women are also a victim of these sexual and physical abuse and some surveys state that aggression is found twice fold in cohabitors than in married couples.
Third, married couples are financially better off when compared to cohabitors though these people have separate savings and banks accounts. Marriage creates a feeling of we than I. Thus both men and women tend to have an eye on the spending of money and thus save a lot more than these cohabiting people.
Married men earn more
Forth, married men always earn more than cohabiting men. In fact they earn twice as much as cohabiting men. Cohabiting women don’t have much access to the earnings of their partner when compared to married women. This fact can be directly attributed to marriage as it creates a sense of responsibility on men and they tend to live for their partner and children. It is common that most men say marriage has changed my life and made me take my life seriously and helped me grow high. Financially speaking, cohabitiors live as single parents. They don’t share their financial problems and thus don’t help each other when there is a sudden crisis. This is not the case in marriage where each one share their money and they strive hard to meet the financial crisis of their family.
Fifth, cohabiting couples normally do not glean the health benefits enjoyed by married people. Normally according surveys, non-married people are less healthy than married people and they have a higher death rate compared to married couples. According to a leading survey the death rate of non married men is 250 percent higher and 50 percent in women. Also cohabiting with serial partners leads to dangerous sexually transmitted diseases.
Most cohabitors live a non committed life that gives more importance to their individuality whereas married couples live for each other and share both happiness and their sorrow. The feeling of marriage always ensures you that you got someone for you to care for your life and this leads to greater mental and physical health. It is also true that compared to singles, married couples are also emotionally happier.
Married couples are better connected to more people than cohabitors. They develop new relationships from marriage like in laws and these people help the couple to gain emotional benefits. They may also provide material benefits and thus make the couple feel relieved in case of any crisis. Though cohabiting people also enjoy these emotional benefits they are no better than a un-married singles.
The emotional health benefits in cohabitation are only for a short period of time as these people do not live together for so long. Only 60 percent of people involved in cohabitation end up marrying each other. Thus when they break up they experience a high emotional stress that one experience in case of divorce.
Sixth, it would surprise many that married couples enjoy a better sex life than cohabiting couples. Though cohabiting couple have sex as married people, they do not enjoy the intimate and fulfilling feeling as marrieds do. Marriage adds the essentials for healthy sex life and it also adds the security and commitment to one’s sex life. Also married people are more likely to be conscious of love and sex as they are made for each other and care for each other.
Finally, cohabitation may affect and may create a barrier in the parental relationship. In some families, cohabitation is accepted and is no longer associated with sin or pathology. But in most it is considered as a wrong practice and parents feel embarrassed in front of their relatives and neighbors. In such cases, it leads to a gap between the cohabitors and their parents. This practice also makes the children of cohabiting couples unaware of their grandparents.
To summarize, marriage is always superior to cohabitation considering the benefits of all the people involved be it men or women or children. More than thirty years of research has shown these facts and one has to accept it without any doubt. Though some argue that cohabitation is better than commitment, it can no way provide the rewards and the merits of marriage. It is not anything like trial marriage and there is no such term as there cannot be any trial to a strong commitment. Cohabitation also does not assure any divorce insurance. The success and the true pleasure of life can be enjoyed only if the couples are married together because living together can not bring these to the cohabitors. Having said about the demerits of cohabitation it should also be highlighted that it is still popular among youths who just don’t see the long term benefits of marriage. The risks associated with this kind of living is also higher than a strong committed marriage and people must realize that true happiness and stability they expect in a close relationship can be given only by marriage.