Choose Abstinence Over Premarital Sex


Most lyrics don’t end without mentioning sex in the songs in fact the subject is known to attract and glue viewers to televisions and has caused some of the biggest celebrity scandals. A renowned R&B Singer Bobby Valentino mentions sex that could make one hear the angels calling in a song called Mrs. Officer in a collaboration with Lil Wayne. Almost everyone advocate it, any reason why it should be avoided? Many wonder and ponder this question everyday.

Feeling Guilty About Sex?

In a TV talk show, Supermodel and Talk Show Host Tyra Banks once asked her female audience of whether they felt guilty after sex in an episode of The Tyra Banks Show called Sex in Tyra’s City on September 22, 2008. As it emerged, guilt is a normal feeling. However, one woman said she didn’t always feel guilty, and a few people with tongues in their cheeks admitted that the guilt Tyra mentioned is normally caused by a reaction in the body in response to doing the things that can potentially affect it emotionally or physically.
According to Dr. Steven Barnhart Ph.D., Chair of the History and Social Science Department at the Middlesex County College in Edison, New Jersey MCC, engaging in sex is a question of trust and commitment and not of marriage since married people are not always committed.

“You could be putting yourself in a predicament to get hurt if you’re not in a committed relationship,” said Dr Barnhart Ph.D in an interview on September 25, 2008.” It could lead to feelings of loneliness, despair or depression just like any other hurtful experience,” he said.

However, sex for young teenagers is totally unacceptable according to Dr. Barnhart who says there is nothing like puppy love. “The love that a seventh-grader would feel for a girl/boyfriend is just as strong as an adult,” he believes. “If they are having sex at a young age, there are many pressures that would cause them to break up, such as school activities, sports and etc’.

A female student from MCC does not agree with practicing abstinence due to guilt or getting attached believes the women are always in total control when it comes to sex. “In the Portuguese culture, we are supposed to practice celibacy. As for me, if it happens it happens,” said Anna Oliveirra, in an interview on September 25, 2008.

Chemical Response to Sex

During sexual intercourse, the body creates a social bond between the male and female by producing a hormone known as Oxytocin, this is commonly referred to as the “love hormone. This hormone is released into the bloodstream, into the brain. According to article in the Scripps magazine, the hormone is produced to enable couples remain together while caring for their offspring. The magazine is published by Scripps Woman College in California.

In this article, A Biologist Looks at Intelligent Design by David Sadava, Pritzker Family Foundation Professor of Biology, Joint Science Department: What Links Bacterial Flaggellum, Oxytocin, and Romantic Prairie Vole, they proved that Prairie Voles and humans both produce Oxytocin and get a strong social bonding while having sex. This bond lasts until the offspring becomes independent and leaves for its own fending.

Basing on these facts, an experiment was carried out to relate the level of trust and the hormone. Two groups of people were given nose sprays. Those whose nasal spray had oxytocin trusted strangers with their money than those whose spray did not have oxytocin. This proved the connection between the hormone and trust.

Is Safe Sex the Best Sex?

One professor from Middlesex County College, who prefers anonymity, said in a September 25, 2008 interview that safe sex is an individual choice to make.. “It is OK for me,” he said. “But in order to take part in any sexual activity, you must be responsible, aware and able to deal with the consequences, such as pregnancy and STDs.”

Being responsible takes one half-way to being safe. HPV, the human papilloma virus, causes genital warts, cervical and other HPV-related cancers. The American Cancer Society predicts that over 11,000 women will be diagnosed with cervical cancer in the U.S in 2008. This virus, and many others, can be contracted even while using a condom. Teenagers are at a higher risk since they do not recognize the potential danger of having sex without protection.

Creating Sparks in the Relationship

The saying: try it out before you buy it could be a reason for premarital sex. “It is OK before marriage because if you end up not liking it, the marriage will be boring,” said Kim Marin from South Plainfield, New Jersey.

The absence of sex provides an alternative avenue of interaction and let couples know each other better, furthermore, couples can rely on books and other sources to spark up their sex lives-not necessarily premarital sex.

Having sex is a choice and if it is done because it is normal, then no one is doing it anyway. The following are opinions of people who are successfully practicing celibacy.

“I am comfortable with being abstinent because you don’t know which guy you will be with, and could accidentally get pregnant and end up with someone for the rest of your life,” said Julissa, 22, from Perth Amboy, New Jersey in an interview on September 25, 2008.

“People practice abstinence not just for spiritual purposes, but it can be empowering; it could challenge one’s ability to be strong,” said Ms. Porshia, 21, from East Orange, New Jersey.

“Certain people do become abstinent for religious purposes,” said Joe Talbert, 19, in an interviewed on September 25, 2008 at Middlesex County College. “Abstinence should be practiced before marriage because people get attached when having sex, and there are diseases out there,” he said.




  1. Yes I agree totally. It is very very important. If a boy wanted to have sex with you, you should dump him. Afterall he is only after your body and not true love as true love can wait.

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