10 Signs that Your Relationship is in Trouble


You are having a wonderful relationship going and the initial excitement and hope with which you started the relationship seems to be sustaining. However, at times, you do experience some signs of negativity during times of togetherness and that can be quite disturbing and even dangerous for the long term health of the bonding if allowed to develop. It is thus essential to recognise the warning signs and be aware of any cracks that are about to develop or are already putting your rapport under strain and take corrective action as necessary.

  1. No Long-term Plans. The partnership is just meandering along without any long term plans and one of the partners is not keen to discuss this in detail. Absence of clarity and resistance to a discussion about the relationship is a sure sign of dwindling interest. If your partner is not willing to participate in an open manner about the future, then you must insist on knowing his or her intentions and urge your partner to be more open about it.
  2. Excessive Demand for Attention. When one of the partners begins demanding a lot of attention and pampering, then that is also a sign of him or her seeking instant happiness over long term contentment. It also shows a streak of bossiness and obsession with self and that is definitely not something you can ignore. Yes, most individuals demand extra attention at some time and point in a relationship, but if this becomes a habit and one of the partners is always trying to satisfy the demands of the other, then the bonding may not last over time as this may not be something that would be sustainable on a consistent basis.
  3. Excessive Talking By One Party. One more sign of a relationship under strain is when the partners always talk of the problems they are facing and do not seem to be enjoying each other’s company. If every meeting or the time spent during the meeting is spent towards solving issues then that is not a good sign.
  4. Frequent Fault-finding.If you and your partner are constantly picking faults with one another and are blowing things out of proportion, then that is another indicator of a relationship that is weakening. It is essential for partners to forgive and sometimes even cover up for one another rather than be on a perpetual fault finding mission. When you forgive and give the benefit of doubt to your partner, you will find that there is reciprocation and that is how a partnership can sustain itself over time.
  5. Frequent quarrels. When frustration and anger is very spontaneous and you seem to be flying off the handle at the slightest provocation, then it means that you are under some stress and that is only likely to worsen the already fragile relationship and weaken it further. So check for your own emotions and that of your partner so that you can spot the danger signs.
  6. Fizzling-out of Passion. If you and your partner feel that the passion and liking for each other is not as intense as it used to be at the beginning of the partnership, then you need to take stock and take remedial measures. Of course, any solution is only possible when you discuss issues rationally with each other and do not get emotional about it and start blaming each other for any of the problems that may have come up on the way.
  7. Insecurity. Insecurity is one more deadly poison that can weaken the strongest of relationships. This arises out of suspicion and the fear that you may be losing your partner to somebody else and that makes you do things or behave in a manner that becomes a big problem and would not be conducive for a healthy relationship.
  8. I Always Seem to be Doing More. Feelings of inequality and complexes arising out of the insecurity mentioned above can make partners think that they are the only ones working at the relationship and are having to sacrifice a lot. This if allowed to fester would soon lead to a situation where the person feels victimised and would not mind if the partnership were to end. That is again not at all recommended and it is important for the couple to have a healthy discussion about the role each one is playing to sustain the relationship.
  9. Lack of Personal Space. The feeling of insecurity can also come about when one of the partners feels that the other is meeting people or going to places without him or her. It is therefore necessary to allow independence and have trust in each other for any relationship to flower.
  10. Divergence of Interests. And the last sign that will indicate that your relationship is in trouble is when you begin noticing that you and your partner’s interest have started diverging. Both of you were once interested in the same things, and enjoyed doing things together. However along the way, as people grow and change, your interests may no longer be as aligned as before. That is fine if there are still some common interests. However when it comes to the point that both of you are always doing everything apart and there is hardly any common shared interests, then it is a sure sign that this relationship is headed for some troubles.

It is important to recognise that a relationship will go through difficult phases. It is up to the couple to make the best use of time and closeness to take it to great heights and not allow it to collapse. That can only happen when they sit together and make a conscious effort to iron out any problems that come along, without blaming one another.

Transparency and honesty in the discussion will help both partners to learn about each other and about themselves which will surely enable the relationship to sustain itself and carry on for many years.