10 Reasons Why You Should Tell Her You Have Cheated


The deed is done. You have cheated on your partner and you cannot reverse the fact. Instead of lying about it and constantly having to fight the fear of being found out, we suggest that the better option would be to come clean and ask for her forgiveness.

While there are merits and demerits to both options, it may be better to opt for making a clean breast of it and ask for her forgiveness. Given below are ten reasons supporting this option and why hiding this incident of infidelity on your part can never be an ideal option. If you are still skeptical, read on and find out for yourself.

No.10 – Because you can’t count on your partner in crime

It is possible that you had a fling with somebody whom you do not know well enough and she is equally unaware of your relationship with somebody else. In which case, you cannot blame her. However, once she does come to know, you cannot be sure that she would not squeal about it to your partner and create problems in the future. You cannot be sure that this woman, with whom you just had a steamy one night stand, would not want something more substantial from you and end up at your apartment one fine day. She might also start calling you at odd hours and make your life a misery. It is this uncertainty that is a strong enough reason for you to come clean with your partner about your mistake.

No.9 – Because the guilt will drive you mad

All said and done, as human beings we are bound to nobody else but our own conscience and the guilt factor is bound to make your life very difficult. Whenever your partner mentions how trustworthy you are or takes good care of you showering her love and affection, your conscience is likely to prick you for that misdemeanor on your part. This feeling will persist all your life and that is why you must confess to your partner and break free of this burden on your conscience.

No.8 – To regain the respect of your peers

It is likely that somebody whom you know would become aware of this incident and this person might end up telling some of your other associates and acquaintances, including women. You will then be judged by them and whenever you run into one of them, you will feel a strange uneasiness. Coming clean will resolve this problem and your friends and acquaintances will appreciate the fact that you have realized your mistake and will even pardon you for it. They will recognize the fact that you are human after all and will respect you for the gumption you showed in confessing about the incident. Getting back some of the lost respect of your associates is another compelling reason as to why you should inform your partner about your mistake.

No.7 – So you can live without paranoia

In addition to the guilt, leading your life with the knowledge of having cheated your partner will not be easy. You will always be on the edge and will want to cover your tracks, in the fear that the truth might get revealed. This insecure feeling and paranoia can be very difficult to deal with and can lead to high stress, anxiety and depression thus providing adequate justification as to why you should come clean with your partner about your infidelity.

No.6 – Because it was a mistake

Confessing your mistake immediately after the event will make your partner you’re your mistake as a genuine one done in the heat of the moment and she might forgive you, as long as you make a commitment that such a thing will not happen again. However, hiding it and taking the risk of her finding it out sometime in the future will put your relationship at grave risk, as it would be construed by her to be a case of deliberate cheating on your part. The price could be a heavy one and you could lose her forever.

No.5 – Because you don’t want to make a second mistake

By hiding your mistake from your partner, you are compounding your problems. If making the mistake was not bad enough, hiding it from her and lying about it will make it seem worse than it is and your image will take a severe beating in the eyes of your partner. The chances of forgiveness from your partner also diminish greatly as it would definitely disturb her that you chose not to come clean on the issue.

No.4 – Because you care about her

Perhaps the strongest and most plausible reason as to why you should confess to your partner is the fact that you love her and care about her. This is the basis of a strong relationship and just the knowledge that your partner is still the same individual should be enough motivation and cause for you to tell her that you committed an error and since you love her so much, you felt it your duty to confess to her. This will surely make her view your indiscretion with some understanding and she is more than likely to forgive you.

No.3 – Because you want to make it work

If you want your existing relationship with your partner to blossom and continue for a long time, you must make a clean breast of your mistake to your partner. Relationships sustain them selves on the basis of love, affection, fidelity and transparency. By doing so, you will reinforce the trust your partner has in you and this will create a stronger foundation of belief and respect for you from your partner and that is going to augur very well for the future of this relationship.

No.2 – Because it’s the right thing to do

As human beings, all of us are answerable to our conscience and know instinctively that is right and what is wrong. You know that it was wrong that you cheated and you also know that it is going to be the right thing to do by owning up to your mistake and that is enough to stop thinking of all other reasons and just concentrate on doing the right thing. By doing the right thing and confessing, you will get the satisfaction that you were man enough to admit your mistake and did not lie like a coward.

No.1 – So she hears it from you

It is always best that she hears about it from you, rather than from somebody else. That will keep the relationship going and put it on a stronger wicket. When she hears about it from elsewhere, the consequences can be disastrous for you and the relationship. Moreover, even if the relationship does survive, it will always disturb you that your partner got to know about it and your image has taken a beating in her eyes.

All of us know that honesty is the best policy and there is no reason as to why you should not practice this in real life with your partner. Treat it as a wonderful opportunity to regain her trust and you will not regret it.




  1. This applies to girls as well.

    I have a girlfriend who confessed that she slept with her ex while we were in a relationship.

    Glad that she came clean, it shows that she is really serious about our relationship.

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