Yea, an antique drawing of mine. Not really antique but it's kinda old. Was drawn early this year. But i still feel it's the best picture to describe my feelings now.

I'm not really a wordy person so i don't fancy putting my heart into words. All i can say is that i'm really down. I can't stand myself being like this, I'm always turning myself to my xanga when i'm feeling low, but when i do that, i realise i don't have to guts to holler everything out loud.

I always thought so long as i don't hurt the people around me it's fine. But who knows, i do hurt them. I do things which are beyond imaginations, i always thought i had my limits. I thought i was being strong. I thought all the while i was trying to solve my problems, but by using my way i realise i was running away instead.

And when i finally took a step forward and realise what it really means by moving on, my world just messed up right in front of me again. But i could blame no one because i rightfully deserved it. Can you believe there's actually a person who would stab her/himself with a sword and ruin him/herself? Ha.. I'm sick yea? Haha........ Well, i did just that. Funny huh? I humour myself sometimes.

Why did i do that? Beats me either. Maybe i'm fond of doing things and then i'll start questioning myself why. Till then, I will have gazillion queries in my puny little brain and then i won't know where's the initial. Even when i try not to give a damn on anything around me, everything just enjoy coming into me. Am i sensitive? Or am i being an over analyser of the world? OH GOD DAMN IT MY BRAIN IS EXPLODING!

Somebody put a stop to my mysteries.