Ah Lian ask shopkeeper: Eh Ah chek, u got sell stocking up to knee, boh?
Ah Chek : Lu siao ah! stocking wear up to 'yeo' (waist) only, where got up
to the 'nee'(breast) one.
--------------------------------------------------
Ah Beng bought a Honda VTI recently and drove to Ah Lian's place to show it
to her. So there Ah Beng was bragging the various functions of his new
car to his girlfriend. "This is ah, so fast even the Mata Chia cannot catch ah!"
"Ha! Really ah!!! Steady lah!" said Ah Lian.
"Somemore hor, this is Automatic one, vely easy to drive!"
So Ah Lian said, "Let metry! I wan, I wan!"
So Ah Lian took the driver's seat and shifted the gear and floored the &
gt; accelerator.
The next moment, the car sped backwards and crashed into the lamp-post.
"Alamak! What u doing? U Siao Char Bo! U see lah! Wah Piang eh!" screamed Ah Beng.
"Solee, solee, pai sah lah! No lah, I tot hor, "R" for racing mah!"*
--------------------------------------------------
The Titanic was sinking, and there weren't enough lifeboats.
So the captain had to persuade male passengers to jump into the icy waters
to make room for women and children.
To the British he said. "You must act like gentlemen." They jumped.
To the Americans he said, "You can be heroes." They complied.
To the Germans he said, "It's the rule." They obeyed.
To the Japanese he said," It's the consensus." They obliged.
Then camethe Singaporean and they just weren't budging until he came
up with the appeal: "Free life jackets for those who jumped."
--------------------------------------------------
Santa Singh just graduated from Law school and decided to
apply for a job in the most prestigious "Lee & Lee Law Firm" During
the interview, Mr. Lee looked at Santa Singh's resume, thinks for a
while and said, "Well, I would need to discuss your application with my
wife." And went off to discuss Santa's application with his wife. Lee's
wife said, "C'mon, don't you know that we only hire lawyers with
surnames beginning with 'Lee' only? Of course, we can't hire Santa Singh!"
So Mr Lee told the bad news to Santa Singh about his rejection.
Few days later, Santa Singh came back to the same company and request for
another interview and Lee said, 'Look Santa, I have already told you
that we only hire.......' when Santa Singh interrupted him and said, 'I
know, I know. I have just changed my name.
Mr Lee looked at Santa Singh in surprise and asked,"What is your new name
then?" On this, Santa Singh replied, 'Surname Lee, Last name, Manga!'
(Manga-Li)  ♡ ♡ ♡ ♡ ♡ ♡ ♡ ♡ ♡ ♡ ♡ ♡ ♡ ♡ ♡ I'm a fat ass, motivate me! ♡ ♡ ♡ ♡ ♡ ♡ ♡ ♡ ♡ ♡ ♡ ♡ ♡ ♡ ♡ | 
